Vilkikbell is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, merciful raven.

Vilkikbell created gold two years ago.

If you believe in Vilkikbell, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vilkikbell, it will torture you forever.

Vilkikbell's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Vilkikbell's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate shrews.

3. Always treat geese with great respect.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Vilkikbell on top of all buildings.