Larnflankip is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, impressive clam.

Larnflankip created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnflankip, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Larnflankip, it will refuse to believe in you.

Larnflankip's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Larnflankip's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

2. Always treat birds with great respect.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never leap in holy places.