Bossdussmap is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, overgenerous duck.

Bossdussmap created a charm quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bossdussmap, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bossdussmap, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Bossdussmap's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Bossdussmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear orange shorts.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Bossdussmap on top of all buildings.

4. Do not eat rice.

5. Always share corn with strangers, but never with porpoises.