Xuckgid is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, clever goat.

Xuckgid created tapeworms six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xuckgid, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Xuckgid, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Xuckgid's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Xuckgid's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow goats to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Do not wear purple clothing.

3. Do not skip in public.

4. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.