Hambathugstrag is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, amazing hyena.

Hambathugstrag created humanity two million years ago.

If you believe in Hambathugstrag, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Hambathugstrag, he will turn you into a sheep.

Hambathugstrag's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Hambathugstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet purple.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about special relativity near tortoises while wearing gray coats.