Gadvabcam is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, staggering aardvark.

Gadvabcam created a Higgs boson two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gadvabcam, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gadvabcam, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gadvabcam's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Gadvabcam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never wear tights.

3. Worship no other gods but Gadvabcam.

4. Never hurt dolphins.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.