Jipwikxuckren is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, blissful swallow.

Jipwikxuckren created dark energy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Jipwikxuckren, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Jipwikxuckren, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Jipwikxuckren's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Jipwikxuckren's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six cats approach from the south.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. You must never eat bananas.

5. Erect seven platinum sculptures of Jipwikxuckren on top of important buildings.