Safgatlik is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, sage bat.

Safgatlik created water four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Safgatlik, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Safgatlik, she will jump up and down on your head.

Safgatlik's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Safgatlik's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with joy.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not travel during autumn.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.