Tonmipsinsand is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, omniscient swan.

Tonmipsinsand created light two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonmipsinsand, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Tonmipsinsand, she will turn you into a sheep.

Tonmipsinsand's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Tonmipsinsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of figs to bats while wearing mauve shoes.

2. Never feed cherries to dogs while wearing ear rings.

3. Never eat oranges.

4. Tonmipsinsand loves dolphins, so they must be respected.

5. Never write about nucleic acids.