Basswegbadnanvag is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, strong beaver.

Basswegbadnanvag created water nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Basswegbadnanvag, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Basswegbadnanvag, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Basswegbadnanvag's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Basswegbadnanvag's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into purple rooms.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Always look after injured whales.

4. You must love Basswegbadnanvag.

5. Never play with disobedient children.