Wegdaphas is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unthinking dingo.

Wegdaphas created vertebrates nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wegdaphas, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wegdaphas, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wegdaphas' most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Wegdaphas' Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare wheat during autumn.

2. Do not wear jumpers marked with gray.

3. Never approach crossroads carrying wood.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always share carrots with strangers, but never with great tits.