Habspaglid is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, emotional dryad.

Habspaglid created the Milkyway eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Habspaglid, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Habspaglid, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Habspaglid's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Habspaglid's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat melons.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Do not speak about cucumbers.

4. Worship no other gods but Habspaglid.

5. Run away if nine mites approach from the south.