Yatthudvig is a god.

It takes the form of a small, intelligent goose.

Yatthudvig created a charm quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatthudvig, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yatthudvig, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Yatthudvig's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Yatthudvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chromosomes.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never think about dark energy near turtles while wearing mauve shoes and balancing nine lead spheres on your legs.