Wanrutmab is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, prudent clam.

Wanrutmab created energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Wanrutmab, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Wanrutmab, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Wanrutmab's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Wanrutmab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear rings.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not speak about garlic.

4. You must never eat pineapples.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.