Zenbissmap is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, emotional wolf.

Zenbissmap created the Black Eye Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenbissmap, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Zenbissmap, he will turn you into a hamster.

Zenbissmap's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Zenbissmap's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never talk about quantum field theory.