Fadweevig is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, unthoughtful wren.

Fadweevig created humanity five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadweevig, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fadweevig, she will turn you into a frog.

Fadweevig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Fadweevig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism near dogs while wearing fawn dresses and balancing seven nickel spheres on your arms.

2. Never hurt swans.

3. Do not eat oranges.

4. Fadweevig must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never wear stockings.