Gemfumcamduss is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, slow wyrm.

Gemfumcamduss created bats seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gemfumcamduss, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gemfumcamduss, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gemfumcamduss' most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Gemfumcamduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Gemfumcamduss in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never write about spacetime.

5. Never sit in the presence of capybaras.