Fadquagxuc is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, kind guinea pig.

Fadquagxuc created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fadquagxuc, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Fadquagxuc, he will destroy your home planet.

Fadquagxuc's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Fadquagxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in the presence of mice.

2. Do not gather at wells at midday.

3. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Fadquagxuc in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Fadquagxuc on top of all buildings.