Gonflapnull is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, competent parrot.

Gonflapnull created the Cigar Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonflapnull, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gonflapnull, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Gonflapnull's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Gonflapnull's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never think ill of sick shrews.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not trade with those who eat melons.