Flagzedlip is a god.

He takes the form of a large, all-knowing jaguar.

Flagzedlip created an electron six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flagzedlip, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Flagzedlip, he will destroy your favourite star.

Flagzedlip's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Flagzedlip's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never sing in the presence of cats.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Flagzedlip in the centre of the settlement.