Japtonkbedappdapyartfet is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, wise crow.

Japtonkbedappdapyartfet created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Japtonkbedappdapyartfet, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Japtonkbedappdapyartfet, she will turn you into a puffin.

Japtonkbedappdapyartfet's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Japtonkbedappdapyartfet's Holy Commandments

1. Always help seals.

2. Always help sick manatees.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.