Arpflamfid is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, egotistical bat.

Arpflamfid created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpflamfid, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Arpflamfid, he will be very sad.

Arpflamfid's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Arpflamfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no tapirs in a room before entering it.

2. Do not hurt seals.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never think about fluid mechanics.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Arpflamfid.