Natgoncapkondodpom is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, clever elephant.

Natgoncapkondodpom created Europe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Natgoncapkondodpom, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Natgoncapkondodpom, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Natgoncapkondodpom's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Natgoncapkondodpom's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Natgoncapkondodpom five times a day.

2. Do not trade with those who eat grapes.

3. Always treat nematodes with great respect.

4. You must never eat wheat.

5. Capybaras are not to be trusted.