Davdubontvedlooplarpvad is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unselfish gerbil.

Davdubontvedlooplarpvad created the Tadpole Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Davdubontvedlooplarpvad, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Davdubontvedlooplarpvad, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Davdubontvedlooplarpvad's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Davdubontvedlooplarpvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed carrots to mice while wearing white ear rings.

2. Never mention aardvarks.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not hop in public.