Pogarpflowomin is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, merciless zebra.

Pogarpflowomin created the planet Earth three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogarpflowomin, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Pogarpflowomin, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Pogarpflowomin's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Pogarpflowomin's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of nebulae into wood.

2. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

3. Never paint your back gray.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate whales.

5. Never fashion tools from clay.