Armgemgum is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unselfish swallow.

Armgemgum created the Sunflower Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Armgemgum, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Armgemgum, he will send you a sign.

Armgemgum's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Armgemgum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about cherries.

2. Never wear dresses.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help ducks in need.