Flabyattcib is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, moody wolf.

Flabyattcib created the planet Earth nine million years ago.

If you believe in Flabyattcib, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Flabyattcib, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Flabyattcib's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Flabyattcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Put Flabyattcib first in all things.

4. Do not speak about apples.

5. Do not kill hamsters.