Dutfenwan is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, sapient gnu.

Dutfenwan created energy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutfenwan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dutfenwan, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dutfenwan's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Dutfenwan's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed oranges to dolphins while wearing ear rings.

2. Always maintain patience during holy days.

3. Never allow moths to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never eat aubergines on days of mourning.