Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, bad-tempered warg.

Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat created silver five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat, it will turn you into a rock.

Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Tofbopnatwatban Sindavquam Wiprulsat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick goats.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not kill pigs.