Cumfetquat is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, staggering dugong.

Cumfetquat created a strange quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumfetquat, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cumfetquat, she will be very sad.

Cumfetquat's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Cumfetquat's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not leap in public.