Kimbatbusbop is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, smart seal.

Kimbatbusbop created dark matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimbatbusbop, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kimbatbusbop, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Kimbatbusbop's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Kimbatbusbop's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kimbatbusbop.

2. Never feed bread to monkeys while wearing corsets.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. You must love Kimbatbusbop.

5. Never mention manatees.