Jonfligfeb is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, loving dove.

Jonfligfeb created bats six billion years ago.

If you believe in Jonfligfeb, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jonfligfeb, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Jonfligfeb's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Jonfligfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Jonfligfeb in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never go into blue rooms.

3. Never think about quantum field theory near voles while wearing purple shirts and balancing five gold spheres on your legs.

4. Do not keep six horses in a large pit.

5. Never think about cell theory.