Spagstafdav is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, egotistical dove.

Spagstafdav created humanity eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagstafdav, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Spagstafdav, she will destroy your home planet.

Spagstafdav's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Spagstafdav's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

4. Never gather six sheep in one place.

5. Never eat tomatoes on days of mourning.