Botxemnut is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, proud otter.

Botxemnut created life two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botxemnut, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Botxemnut, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Botxemnut's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Botxemnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Always help frogs.

4. You must pray to Botxemnut seven times a day.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Botxemnut.