Gedbepvonbast is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, cheerful hippopotamus.

Gedbepvonbast created the planet Mars six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gedbepvonbast, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gedbepvonbast, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Gedbepvonbast's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Gedbepvonbast's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never think about optics near monkeys while wearing cyan trousers and balancing eight gold spheres on your arms.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not hop in public.