Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, bad-tempered dugong.

Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok created the Tadpole Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Quamkemtettirulltinnigquatyok's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat tomatoes.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.