Dimsugjip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, conceited otter.

Dimsugjip created an up quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dimsugjip, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dimsugjip, he will throw large rocks at you.

Dimsugjip's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Dimsugjip's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never prepare figs during autumn.