Tonklikfed is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, ill-tempered goblin.

Tonklikfed created oxygen eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonklikfed, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Tonklikfed, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tonklikfed's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Tonklikfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lentils to ants while wearing purple corsets.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never laugh in the presence of frogs.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. Never pour water over plants.