Homjamtof is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, fast bee.

Homjamtof created time and space four billion years ago.

If you believe in Homjamtof, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Homjamtof, he will make you grow a tail.

Homjamtof's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Homjamtof's Holy Commandments

1. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Do not hurt hamsters.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.