Migtompak is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, cheerful elephant.

Migtompak created the planet Jupiter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Migtompak, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Migtompak, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Migtompak's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Migtompak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Migtompak's name in vain.

2. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Retreat if eight grasshopers approach from the east.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Hide from white moths for they are unholy.