Banflaggov Fotzakflan is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, almighty bear.

Banflaggov Fotzakflan created the world eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Banflaggov Fotzakflan, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Banflaggov Fotzakflan, he will send minions to preach to you.

Banflaggov Fotzakflan's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Banflaggov Fotzakflan's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Put Banflaggov Fotzakflan first in all things.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Banflaggov Fotzakflan.

4. Never think about quantum field theory.

5. Do not make images of living things.