Sidcebhot Bemdaddim is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, capable rhinoceros.

Sidcebhot Bemdaddim created a strange quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sidcebhot Bemdaddim, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sidcebhot Bemdaddim, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Sidcebhot Bemdaddim's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Sidcebhot Bemdaddim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never think about special relativity near horses while wearing white skirts and balancing three silicon spheres on your head.

3. Do not dye your hair black.

4. Never allow snails to witness sacred rites.

5. Erect seven gold sculptures of Sidcebhot Bemdaddim on top of important buildings.