Bedpagflis is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, benevolent raccoon.

Bedpagflis created humanity five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedpagflis, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Bedpagflis, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bedpagflis' most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Bedpagflis' Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. You must pray to Bedpagflis three times a day.

3. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Bedpagflis in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Foxes are not to be trusted.