Jannullhubtofmeg is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tiresome bear.

Jannullhubtofmeg created an up quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jannullhubtofmeg, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jannullhubtofmeg, he will be mildly annoyed.

Jannullhubtofmeg's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Jannullhubtofmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near otters while wearing indigo shirts and balancing four carbon spheres on your arms.

2. Never write about thermodynamics.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Jannullhubtofmeg.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.