Femtunham is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, kind guinea pig.

Femtunham created the Tadpole Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Femtunham, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Femtunham, it will strike you with lightening.

Femtunham's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Femtunham's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in the presence of elders.

2. Do not resist balance.

3. Always look after injured nematodes.

4. Never touch blood while blessed.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near goats while wearing gray stockings.