Tafjig is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, selfish wombat.

Tafjig created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Tafjig, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tafjig, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tafjig's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Tafjig's Holy Commandments

1. Tafjig must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. You must pray to Tafjig four times a day.

4. Feed all hungry rats.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Tafjig.