Tikhassog Geplipyam is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omniscient shark.

Tikhassog Geplipyam created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tikhassog Geplipyam, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tikhassog Geplipyam, he will turn you into a slug.

Tikhassog Geplipyam's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Tikhassog Geplipyam's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear green stockings.

2. Never talk about spacetime near foxes while wearing gray shoes.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never talk about planets.