Tamflapnar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, vain mole.

Tamflapnar created the Sunflower Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tamflapnar, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tamflapnar, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Tamflapnar's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Tamflapnar's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick porpoises.

2. Never bounce in winter.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Feed all hungry mites.

5. Always store melons above ground.