Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, dishonest slug.

Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow created everything that exists eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always obey Cepjannutt Abpomwanjenvan Betflow's priests.

5. Always stare at clouds.