Fednut is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, omnipotent snail.

Fednut created a quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fednut, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fednut, it will turn you into a rock.

Fednut's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Fednut's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat gooseberries.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Run away if five dogs approach from the south.

4. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.