Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, witless snake.

Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag created an up quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag, he will curse you with boils.

Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always help sheep in need.

3. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag in the centre of the settlement.

4. Erect seven gold sculptures of Ranrigjamdudrotgamwadpag on top of important buildings.

5. Never eat green fruit.