Narquathig is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, dishonest swallow.

Narquathig created an atom eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Narquathig, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Narquathig, he will turn you into a rat.

Narquathig's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Narquathig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help dogs in need.

2. You must pray to Narquathig six times a day.

3. Never go into fawn rooms.

4. Never talk about solid mechanics near monkeys while wearing cyan coats and balancing four carbon spheres on your face.

5. Never think ill of sick mice.